Tag Archives: funny

Editing Tip: How to Pluralize Your Holiday Cards

miserable kids at Christmas

What not to do this Christmas.

Here’s a hilarious (and largely accurate) article to help you figure out how to fill out your Christmas (or other-holiday-of-your-choosing) card.

Q: What if my last name ends in a Y? 
A: Add an S. Do not add -IES or an apostrophe.
Merry Christmas from the Murphys. 

Q: What if my last name already ends in an S? 
A: Add -ES. Do not add an apostrophe.
Season’s greetings from the Simmonses.

Q: What if the end of my last name normally functions as an irregular noun? 
A: It is not irregular when it is part of a last name.
Happy holidays from the Hoffmans. Warm wishes from the Wolfs. 

Q: What would adding an apostrophe do? 
A: It would hurt Tiny Tim make your last name possessive.

Go read all about it: http://www.slate.com/blogs/browbeat/2014/11/25/how_to_make_your_last_name_plural_on_holiday_cards_and_avoid_apostrophe.html?google_editors_picks=true

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The Dating Game: Greek Gods Edition

This is the kind of silliness that happens when you’re obsessed with Greek mythology and bad puns. If the Greek pantheon were on a kitchy dating show, how would they be advertised?

Zeus: They say lightning never strikes twice…

Hades: His love will burn you up with desire.

Poseidon: Still waters run deep. His love is a tempest!

Hera: She’s the original MILF!

Hephaestus: He’s made to love you.

Artemis: She loves the hunt and the thrill of the chase.

Apollo: He’ll light up your life.

Aries: Love is a battlefield.

Athena: You’ll choose her… if you’re wise.

Demeter: The grass can’t get any greener (time to roll in the hay?)

Hermes: The fastest thing in the universe…is his love!

Gaia: She’ll mean the world to you!

Hercules: He’s been through 12 labors, but a woman ain’t one!

Aphrodite: Love like the original.

Mnemosyne: Better than you’ll ever remember!

Atlas: He’ll move heaven and earth for you!

 

And some bonus villains:

Cyclops: He only has eye for you!

Minotaur: You bring out the beast in him!

Centaur: Desire makes him a stallion in bed!

Hydra: When he’s thwarted, his love for you will return twofold!

Medusa: The snakes aren’t venomous, but she sure is!

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