User Experience Feedback for Human Infant

To the Developer(s) of the Human Infant:

I recently acquired your product and, for the most part, I enjoy it. However I have some user experience feedback that will provide an overall better experience if implemented.

Let’s start with the process to acquire a Human Infant:

  • It’s tough to get your hands on one! I understand you want to be choosy, but it is confusing, as a customer, why some are able to pick one up right away (the first month of trying!) and others have to wait years. I’ve heard some aren’t able to get one at all. And then there are those who don’t want one, and yet find the acquisition process has begun regardless! Work on your distribution line to clear up these discrepancies.
  • It’s a lot of work to begin the acquisition! Perhaps this could be done in a way with fewer side effects for the end customer?
  • There’s no getting around this: it’s troubling that payment in the form of physical pain is a requirement for acquisition of an Infant. I understand this is a challenging product to acquire, but the amount of pain asked for is unreasonable. Lower this cost for greater future investments. 
  • It takes so much energy to acquire one! It’s really quite a lot of work, which can be a strain on the Mom Module.
  • The acquisition comes with so many side effects. Some don’t even make any sense. Mine came with Flabby Belly and Sore Wrist.

On the Human Infant itself:

  • The product arrives way too immature. I understand there is a DIY component, and it is cool that you can customize it to some degree, but it would be great if out-of-the-box the Infant came with some basics, like Ability to Smile and Understands How to Eat. Giggle would be a great upgrade, too! It just seems crazy that this product naturally comes with so few skills. It doesn’t really do anything at first, for, like, months.
  • Where is the instruction manual?!
  • I understand the digestion module is under development when it arrives, but it would be great if it worked better with the provided breastfeeding equipment. It is really hard to tell if you have a match before the product arrives! Plus it is hard to use and difficult to get it correctly docked. Have you considered a hands-free mode? Just an idea.
  • All the built-in sounds are the same. At least initially, there is no difference between an alarm and the Hungry mode. Some separation would really improve the whole system.
  • I hear Mobility comes with the Toddler upgrade. I’m looking forward to trying it out! Can you explain why the other models come with Mobility and this one doesn’t? I’m thinking of Horse, but even Shark has it, so I know you can do it.
  • Maybe I’m using it improperly, but why does the breastfeeding module, when combined with Human Infant, require a pain payment? Didn’t we pay enough upfront? These microtransactions are getting out of hand.
  • It is LOUD. Please add a mute or volume button.
  • My model did not come with a charging cable; as a result, it goes into sleep mode about every three hours. It also needs regular maintenance. This product would be a lot more fun with more interactive up time.
  • The waste disposal system is a literal mess. Can we get an indicator light or something before dispersal?
  • I’ve seen your other models, such as Seahorse and Emperor Penguin, so I know it is possible to have greater integration with the Dad Module. Please consider implementing these changes; right now, it seems like Mom Module has all the interaction. It is fun, but unbalanced.
  • Is it supposed to produce so much gas?
  • Seriously, why doesn’t it do anything? Literally every other species’ model works right out of the box. It’s kind of boring for the first several months.

Human Infant has many devoted fans; I just believe these would be significant improvements to an already great product. I hope you find this feedback helpful and I look forward to the improved model, which would greatly increase the likelihood I will acquire another to add to my collection.

A Human Mom

Thanks,

PS. Thanks for Dogs and Cats. Both are pretty great as-is.

Leave a comment

Filed under Short Stories

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s